Chapter 8

Thinking back now, I realize I was pretty much a hopeless romantic in those days.

I moved to Beijing for Xie Chuan-I became a beipiao for him.

Having never really suffered growing up, I squeezed into the 8 a.m. subway, rented a shabby little room, and earned just over four thousand yuan a month.

Back then, Xie Chuan was still in grad school, just another poor guy.

After I started working, my social circle grew, and I began to truly experience the warmth and coldness of the world.

In my very first job, I encountered workplace harassment from my boss.

He asked me directly, “Gu Qiao, how much does your boyfriend make a month? Can he afford to support you?

“I think you should get a new bag. Do you like Louis Vuitton or Chanel? I’ll buy it for you.

“You’re very beautiful and smart. You should know how to take shortcuts.”

I threw my resignation letter right at his head and walked away without looking back.

I used to tell Xie Chuan, Louis Vuitton bags are so ugly-how could anyone spend tens of thousands on one?

Later, a senior colleague in my team bought a Louis Vuitton bag on her credit card and smoothly closed a project deal.

She told me, “Gu Qiao, a lot of people respect the clothes before the person. If you go to a business meeting carrying a Louis Vuitton and driving a BMW, it’s definitely different from showing up on a shared bike.

“How many people look glamorous on the outside but live in basements after work? It’s laughable, isn’t it? But that’s reality.”

Maybe it was from then on that I gradually began to understand just how powerless the word “reality” can be.

After graduation, I rarely asked my family for money, and my parents seemed to support me in toughening myself up.

Before graduating, I dreamed of getting promoted and earning a raise through my own efforts. Xie Chuan would also take on some side projects from time to time.

He often cooked delicious meals and brought them to my office, and would give me gifts within his means.

After work, I would sit on the back of his little electric scooter, carefree in the wind, hugging his waist and watching the endless stream of people and cars.

“Xie Chuan, actually, after seeing it so much, Louis Vuitton doesn’t look that tacky anymore.”

He smiled, “Then let’s save up and buy you one.”

I shook my head, “No, it’s too expensive. A high-quality fake is just over a thousand yuan. A knockoff is fine-you wouldn’t believe how snobbish people can be these days.

“When you have money in the future, buy me a Hermès, one of those that cost hundreds of thousands.”

I hugged his waist and swayed, dreaming about our future life, pointing at the cars speeding by.

“Do you like that Land Rover? I think it’s a few million. When you become rich, you can buy one.”

I thought, we have hands, feet, education, and we’re willing to work hard-surely our efforts will be rewarded.

But in a big city, talent is never in short supply, and life slowly wears down the sharp edges of youth.

In the second year after graduation, I earned a bonus of over 10,000 yuan at mid-year and was overjoyed.

It happened to be close to Xie Chuan’s birthday, so I gritted my teeth and bought him a watch, spending 10,000 yuan.

He often needed to check the time, and for his birthday, I wanted to give him something nice.

It should have been a happy occasion. I ordered a cake and even booked a restaurant we usually couldn’t bear to splurge on. I gave him the gift with great anticipation.

Unexpectedly, after opening it, he was stunned for a long time and only said, “Gu Qiao, can you return it?”

It was like a bucket of cold water poured over my enthusiasm. I didn’t even eat dinner and turned to leave.

I felt both wronged and bitter. I had worked so hard for that money, spent so long preparing the gift, and he didn’t even say thank you.

For the next two days, he didn’t contact me either. It was our first cold war.

Later, his advisor reached out to me, saying that Xie Chuan had been borrowing money from several classmates lately because his father had suffered an accident and needed surgery.

His advisor said the only fully-funded overseas study spot in the department had been given to him, but because of me, he gave it up.

Overseas research jobs pay very well. It’s an opportunity many people dream of, truly rare. His professor asked me to try to persuade him.