Chapter 11

Chapter 11

When I returned to Shen Sui’s residence, he was sitting on the sofa, staring at me with an expressionless face.

“Jiang Zhi, you’ve certainly grown some backbone. What a temper.

“Were you staying away just to wait for me to coax you back?”

He let out an impatient click of his tongue, a smirk playing on his lips that carried a hint of malicious mockery.

“Did I ever tell you that I don’t do ‘coaxing’?”

I realized with absolute clarity that he didn’t love me-not even once.

A sudden wave of sadness washed over me. I loved myself dearly, and I believed in myself.

Yet for Shen Sui’s sake, I had compromised and humbled myself time and time again, constantly berating myself for not being good enough.

A lack of love is simply a lack of love; excuses like ‘not being good enough’ are just that-excuses.

“I never thought that. I’m just here to pack my things and leave.

“Everything I said that day was serious. I wasn’t just acting out in a fit of pique.”

Shen Sui cracked his knuckles, a habitual gesture he made when his patience was wearing thin.

“Jiang Zhi, stop making a scene. I won’t forgive you a second time.”

As if to prove a point, he repeated himself, his voice dropping low:

“There won’t be a second time.”

Shen Sui’s eyes were light in color. With the light hitting his face, he possessed a sort of cold, inhuman indifference.

I had tried to break up with him once last year.

It was over something trivial, so small that I could no longer remember why we had even argued.

Shen Sui hadn’t understood. He tried to talk me out of it once or twice, but when I wouldn’t budge, he snapped and told me never to show my face again.

The moment I stepped out of his sight, the tears wouldn’t stop falling.

I didn’t work for an entire month. I spent long hours staring into space, unwilling to interact with anyone.

I kept the curtains drawn even during the day, only occasionally peering out the window.

My mind was a muddled mess, and at any given moment, my eyes would well up with heat.

Later, it was Aunt Shen who told Shen Sui to come and apologize to me.

Aunt Shen told me, “I was wondering why Shen Sui seemed so distracted when he came home today. As soon as I told him to go find you, he headed right over.

“Don’t hold a grudge. It’s not easy for two people to be together.”

That phrase “not easy” was just a casual remark she used to encourage reconciliation, but I knew exactly how much effort I had poured in just to be with Shen Sui.

Falling for someone truly happens in a single instant.

Shen Sui was my senior in high school. From the day I enrolled, I had been hearing legends about him.

As a math competition student, he had secured early admission to a prestigious university.

On the day Shen Sui returned to our alma mater to give a speech, I sat in the audience watching him. I saw his almost reckless, youthful spirit.

Amidst the roar of the crowd, I thought to myself: *I want to become someone like him.*

Our second meeting happened when I was sitting on the stairs crying because I couldn’t solve a problem.

It was the old, dilapidated teaching building. Aside from a few extra-curricular activities, no one ever went there.

Shen Sui was surprised when he walked upstairs and saw me.

“I didn’t think anyone would be in a place this remote.”

He belatedly noticed my tears and said “Sorry” with a hint of guilt.

I lowered my head and remained silent, staring at the exercise book on my lap.

Shen Sui glanced down, following my gaze, seemingly sensing the situation.

He only said two things, his tone very earnest.

He said, “Hard work pays off for those who persist.”

He also said, “Junior, keep it up.”

I always remembered that.

I remembered the color of the mottled stains on the walls of the old teaching building and the way the Boston ivy clung to the exterior, but I didn’t know then that the person standing before me would make my heart race so violently.

Later, I learned that the math problem I couldn’t solve back then actually had four different solutions.

But I still didn’t know what it would take to make Shen Sui love me.

After Shen Sui brought me back that time, we tacitly agreed never to mention the incident again.

Perhaps even then, I knew that he and I wouldn’t last, but I was simply unwilling to admit it.